There are moments when not being okay is entirely expected and perfectly healthy. Often we have times and situations that occur in life that are so far out of our control, and the unknown seems so vast that trying to maintain a level of constant positivity and positive outlook only makes things harder.
Trying to force yourself to be in a constant state of positivity, tirelessly looking for the silver lining, and re-listing things you are grateful for over and over again can often further the feeling of despair.
It is during those times when it’s okay to admit to yourself that you are not okay…and that things are not okay. Now, this doesn’t mean that you sit in that negative space and allow it to consume you, but it is healthy to both acknowledge and FEEL those feelings.
We are all made up of energy, and when times get tough, and there is a lot of negative energy surrounding us, it also starts to live within us. It is great to try to offset that negativity with positivity, but that negative energy that resides within needs a way to escape.
Acknowledging those negative feels and letting them pass through you is a form of getting them out of you. Think of it as a clearing. There are times when a good cry or screaming into a pillow is just what you need to feel better because it’s a release of pent up negative energy and emotions.
Without that release, that negative energy stays trapped within and manifest itself into anxiety, depression, and other physical and mental ailments. It is essential to make sure you do not stay in a place of negativity for more than a few days, which is why finding ways to release that negative energy is so important.
Here are some healthy ways to provide a release for any sadness, frustration, anger, or anxiety that you may be feeling during times of uncertainty.
- Scream it out (into a pillow) – sometimes the quickest and easiest release, when you have a lot of frustration boiling inside, is to just let it explode verbally by belting out a loud scream. Just make sure you do it into a pillow to muffle the sound as you don’t want anyone thinking something terrible is happening to you, and they call the police.
- Cry it out – if you need to, find a place where you can be alone…whether it is in the shower, sitting alone in your car, or hiding in your closet and let the tears just flow. Allow thoughts of sadness and despair to come through you and let them flow out with your tears. Sometimes watching a sad movie helps to get the waterworks following.
- Vent it out – call up a trusted confidant, friend, family member, or someone that you can talk to. Then talk through all of the issues that are causing you angst. The talk isn’t to find solutions or answers but to verbally express your feelings.
- Sing it out – find a song that expresses how you’re feeling, turn the volume up and wail out those emotions.
And my favorite two (also the most common ways to deal with stress, anxiety, and anger):
- Get Creative – express your emotions through art by painting, drawing, or writing.
- Get Moving – dance, exercise, yoga, try kickboxing, a hit a punching bag or pillow. Think of non-harmful ways to move your body and allow that exertion to release any pent up negative energy.
One important note to remember is there is such a thing as an emotional hangover, so do not expect to feel better immediately. It may take a couple hours or even a day after releasing those emotions for the emotional hangover to subside. Be patient and allow yourself time to recover.
And as always, if the above does not help and you find yourself feeling stuck in a negative place for more than a few days or if you are having thoughts of harming yourself or others, please seek immediate professional and medical attention.